JJs Twats & Toons

This just goes to show that even the oldest profession in the world had to adapt with the times and get with the modern age

I find it both exciting and somewhat disturbing to picture the hookers of the future online cybersex 3d virtual worlds…500 lb men looking like the hot white haired chick in Heavy Metal….shudder

You often hear 50+ people talking about how things were better way back and how the Internet has helped destroy society on and on and on they go and we think yeah whatever…the stuff we have now rocks.

Though….if this is what Good ol days were and these are what people are talking about when they say partylines then I really think we missed out on some good times….like how we missed the Free Love of the 60s…nowadays love costs you at least dinner and a glass of wine.

It’s cheating little bitch actresses like this that should get cock-slapped by cocks like this…

They go on their special protein diets so that they can stay alive and feed their anorexia at the same time, and then they lie and are lazy and don’t swallow the load when it is delivered.

The media keeps telling people about the horrible things that can happen if they smoke marijuana…

If your girlfriend happens to be a typical blonde bimbo slut like this one, forgotten sextoys of course is another thing to be aware of.

I don’t know what planet this is where a woman’s pussy is a pussy…

But whatever planet it is, if a pussy is a pussy then guys have got to evolve their cocks into dogs…maybe this would be easier if they were on Pluto.

Another reason why the Americans are better than the British…you see James Bond may have had chicks with names like Pussy Galore and Holly GoodHead, but when he was in bed with them they were all silent little fuck toys…

American agents make their chicks cum so hard they scream and the CIA double penetration action gives a whole new definition to ‘Double Agent’…after all CIA stands for Cocks In Action.

Nowadays it’s hard to tell which part of a woman is fake and which is real…with all the different implants readily available to be inserted here there and everywhere, these chicks are spending thousands of dollars to turn themselves into something they weren’t meant to be.

The problem with this is that they end up about as real as one of these toons at Trashy Toons…which I guess is good for this chick; cos in reality a hole like that on her ass would have her screaming bloody murder, not nagging at her man for slapping her too hard.

Dont know if you ever watched this movie from the 90s starring John Ritter where he was trapped in his tv going channel to channel…well of course like any such movie needs to do it included a part where he got turned into a toon and was in a toon world.

Trashy Toons is there to remind us that if you get stuck as a toon make sure you seek out the toon sluts of their toon world so you can get head from a babe like this instead of being in a less enjoyable toonland where you get an anvil on your head instead.

This is the reason the Irish should be in charge of television programming…Mulligan’s Stew.

Crappy shows like Divorce Court, Sex Court and all the idiotic reality shows that people glue themselves to…mix them together and you get a stew that will make your cock spew.

Everybody all over the world is starting to get ready for the Summer Olympics.  Unfortunately this includes some left-wing spazoids…

These left-wing spazoids would be better served making the boring version of the Olympics (the Winter ones) more interesting by petitioning for sports like this.

Ah if only life could be like it is in the funnies; the world would be full of colorful people interacting in hilariously entertaining ways, and bleeding heart liberals would have a field day.

In this toon the victim has been empowered with the right to dictate what punishment her perpetrator has to endure.  In typical female style, this blonde babe goes for the most torturous thing she can imagine with this huge hairy BUW (big ugly woman) momma and really makes him pay for his crimes.

Some guys are so desperate to get laid that they ignore all the warning signs before plunging their cock into an inviting hole…

You’d think the barbed wire and huge sign warning of cannibal women would deter this horny fucker from sticking his dick in that hole in the fence, but as is so often the case, the need for sexual satisfaction has overwhelmed his basic male instincts for survival…that is unless he’s a severe masochist and that’s why his cock is so incredibly hard knowing just how much pain and torture he’s going to experience at this hole in the wall.

To any of you out there who have read comics in the last 50 years, a mainstay of the DC Universe was Jonn Jonnz, the Martian Manhunter.  He has been in every incarnation of the Justice League of America and is now dead.  Not X-Man dead…dead dead.

So in honor to a fallen hero of myth, Trashy Toons presents this Oreo sandwich for him (Oreo’s were Jonn’s favorite Earth food).

So many of these Trashy Toons cartoons remind me of “The Far Side” and “Mad Magazine”

So my question is…why the hell has no-one ever made an adult humor cartoon magazine?  (and best of Hustler and best of Playboy cartoon collections doesn’t count).

Women are bitches for the most part, and when you screw them over they become vindictive malicious bitches who will go to extreme lengths to exact their revenge upon you…

This dude only has himself to blame, not only has he been off fucking some other chick when he’s got a perfectly willing blonde slut at home, but he’s also completely oblivious to the fact that his soon-to-be-ex is shoving those beans down her throat faster than he can ram his cock in her soon-to-be-exploding ass.